Can an Empath Become a Narcissist? Understanding

Fahim chughtai
25 Min Read

Empaths and narcissists seem like complete opposites. Empaths feel deeply what others feel1. Narcissists are great at controlling and manipulating people1. But, their relationship is more complex than it seems. Can someone as caring as an empath turn into a narcissist, known for being self-centered and lacking empathy? This piece will explore the intricate dynamics between them, offering insights that might surprise you.

Let’s dicuss can an empath become a narcissist?

Key Takeaways

  • Empaths and narcissists have very different traits. Empaths are sensitive and caring, while narcissists focus on themselves and manipulate others.
  • The attraction between empaths and narcissists can lead to harmful and dependent relationships.
  • Understanding and feeling others’ emotions are key in the relationship between empaths and narcissists.
  • Narcissists often use tricks like mirroring and gaslighting to control empaths.
  • Empaths can protect themselves by setting boundaries, communicating well, and taking care of themselves in relationships with narcissists.

Defining Empaths and Narcissists

To grasp the complex relationship between empaths and narcissists, we must first define these two types. Empaths are known for their deep empathy and emotional connection. They can feel others’ emotions as if they were their own2. These individuals are naturally inclined to support and understand others, driven by a strong wish to connect and help.

Empaths: Highly Sensitive and Compassionate

Empaths are highly sensitive, noticing the emotions and energies around them. They can empathize deeply, sometimes feeling overwhelmed2. These individuals are deeply compassionate, aiming to build harmonious relationships. They often put others’ needs before their own.

Narcissists: Self-Absorbed and Manipulative

Narcissists have a high self-image and crave constant praise, lacking empathy for others3. They are cunning and emotionally manipulative, using their insight to control people4. Though they may seem charming and supportive, they are often self-centered and exploitative.

Knowing the traits of empaths and narcissists helps us understand the complex dynamics between them234.

The Allure of Opposites

The bond between empaths and narcissists is often intriguing. About 60-80% of online content talks about their relationship5. Empaths are drawn to narcissists’ confidence and charm. On the other hand, narcissists see empaths as a way to get attention and validation.

This relationship can turn toxic fast. Empaths try to help narcissists, leading to emotional abuse. Studies show narcissists often befriend other narcissists for their shared desire for admiration5. This shows the relationship between an empath and a narcissist might not be as balanced as it seems.

“The empath may be drawn to the narcissist’s confidence and charisma, while the narcissist may see the empath’s compassion and sensitivity as a way to fulfill their need for attention and validation.”

Narcissism and codependency come in different levels in people5. The connection between an empath and a narcissist can range from a brief interest to a deep, unhealthy bond. Both narcissists and narcissistic empaths often lack boundaries and need validation from others5.

The attraction of opposites is both strong and risky. Understanding this dynamic is key for better relationships. Narcissists prefer those with weak boundaries and a need to please, traits of codependency, not empathy5. Empaths can set better boundaries and focus on their well-being. Narcissists can work on their need for validation.

The relationship between empaths and narcissists is complex. Covert narcissists can act like energy vampires, using others for their own needs5. It’s important for both sides to understand this dynamic to avoid toxic relationships.

Some narcissistic coaches on social media offer harmful advice5. It’s crucial to look at this topic with empathy and a balanced view. This helps empaths and narcissists build healthier relationships based on respect and growth5.

In conclusion, the connection between empaths and narcissists is fascinating but complex. By understanding the underlying factors, both can aim for better relationships. These should focus on mutual respect, accountability, and personal growth5.

Cognitive vs. Affective Empathy

Empathy has two main parts: cognitive and affective. Cognitive empathy means understanding others’ thoughts and feelings without feeling them yourself6. People with narcissistic traits often have this kind of empathy. They use it to understand and control others7. Studies show that those with narcissistic personality disorder can understand others’ feelings but might avoid their pain6.

Affective empathy is about feeling and sharing others’ emotions6. Those with high affective empathy, known as empaths, deeply connect with others’ feelings8. About 33% of people fall into this empathetic group with low dark traits8.

Feeling empathy uses different brain systems for different emotions like fear or sadness6. Things like how we were attached to others and our natural temperament affect our empathy6.

“Empathy is a complex trait with both thinking and feeling parts, starting in the second year of life. It’s shaped by genes and the environment.”6

In short, cognitive empathy lets us understand others without feeling their feelings. Affective empathy means we can deeply feel and connect with others’ emotions7. Narcissists often have more cognitive empathy for manipulation, while empaths feel others’ feelings deeply8.

Apparent Insightfulness: A Narcissist’s Mirroring Tactic

Narcissists are great at copying the behaviors and interests of others, making it seem like they really get you9. This trick makes people trust them more and helps them control the relationship9.

They know how to see things from another person’s point of view, even if they don’t feel what that person feels9. This lets them seem really connected and caring9.

But, this mirroring isn’t about being truly caring or understanding. It’s a way to trick people into trusting them more9. Behind the scenes, narcissists really want admiration, control, and to feel better than others9.

It’s important for empaths to see through this trick to stay safe9. Knowing the real reason behind the narcissist’s charm helps empaths protect themselves9.

“Narcissists can be incredibly charming and insightful in the beginning, making you feel deeply understood and validated. But this is all a carefully crafted illusion to gain your trust and exploit your vulnerabilities.”

Underhanded Superiority: The Narcissist’s True Colors

Underneath their charming and humble look, narcissists believe they are superior and entitled. They may seem caring and reserved at first, but their true nature can show through. These subtle signs of arrogance and entitlement can be early clues of their true selves, even in the beginning of a relationship.

Covert narcissists are experts in hidden arrogance. They might give a compliment and then an insult to make their victim feel bad while seeming supportive10. They also use coded language to subtly put down people in public, focusing on sensitive topics known only to the victim and them10.

Covert narcissists often blame their victims to distract from their own actions, quickly changing their behavior from negative to positive10. They use “tunnel vision minimization,” focusing on small details to downplay their victim’s achievements or assets10.

Gossip is another way narcissists keep up a false image of being superior. By sharing negative info about others, they boost their own social status and sense of entitlement. This behavior can make victims feel alone, misunderstood, and doubt their own worth.

“Narcissists have a deep need to feel superior to others, and they will use any means necessary to maintain that sense of superiority, even if it means engaging in underhanded or manipulative behavior.”

As time goes on, the narcissist’s true nature may become more clear, leaving their partner feeling drained and emotionally hurt. Knowing these subtle signs of hidden arrogance and superiority is key to spotting and dealing with the deeper issues in the relationship11.

Hypersensitivity to Criticism: A Fragile Ego

Narcissists have a fragile self-esteem that depends a lot on what others think of them12. They get very upset by any criticism or negative comments, showing anger, pulling away, or getting defensive12. When an empath gives honest feedback, the narcissist can get very upset. This is because it goes against their high opinion of themselves and their need for everything to be perfect12.

Vulnerable narcissists are very insecure and easily hurt by rejection, needing constant praise from others13. They often feel not good enough, anxious, and sad because they always want approval. They act like victims and don’t care much for others’ feelings13. In relationships, they can quickly switch from idealizing to devaluing their partners13.

Knowing how sensitive narcissists are can help you spot one12. It’s important to understand their fragile ego to handle interactions better and set clear boundaries13.

narcissist hypersensitivity

“Narcissists have a fragile sense of self-esteem that is heavily reliant on external validation and admiration.”

When dealing with a narcissist’s sensitivity to criticism, you need to be careful13. Giving feedback should be done in a kind way, focusing on actions not personal traits13. Empaths should watch how they react, as being too emotional can make the narcissist more defensive12.

By understanding the narcissist’s fragile ego and being careful, empaths can handle these situations better13. Getting help from mental health experts can also offer great advice and ways to deal with a narcissist’s sensitivity13.

Victim Mentality: Deflecting Responsibility

Narcissists often play the victim, blaming others for their own failures14. They can’t own up to their actions because it would hurt their big ego14. They look for others to blame, making excuses to save their ego14. This way, they dodge accountability and keep up the illusion of being perfect.

Narcissists use tricks to avoid blame14. They shift their bad traits onto others, attack to defend themselves, and lie to seem better14. This is how they deal with feeling bad about themselves and their harmful actions14.

“Narcissists may act as if they feel sincere remorse rarely, especially when manipulating others to regain trust.”15

The victim act hurts relationships with empaths15. Narcissists push their bad qualities onto the empath, making them feel bad about themselves15. To escape this, empaths need to understand this pattern and stand up for themselves15.

It’s key to fight the narcissist’s blame game in these relationships14. By seeing through their tricks, empaths can stand up for themselves14. This helps the empath stay healthy and might lead to a better relationship.

Covert Manipulation: The Empath’s Achilles’ Heel

Being in a relationship with a narcissist is tricky, especially for empaths. They might not see the hidden ways to control and manipulate them. Empaths are seen as modern-day heroes, helping others heal and showing endless love. But, this kindness and sensitivity can make them vulnerable to the narcissist’s sneaky tricks.

Narcissists use gaslighting as a powerful tool. They are very sensitive to criticism or any threat to their16. They respond by slowly eroding the empath’s reality16. Through subtle words and feelings, the narcissist makes the empath question their own thoughts, memories, and sanity. This leaves them feeling lost, unsure, and helpless.

Narcissists also use emotional blackmail. They need to control those close to them16. By threatening to take away love, attention, or basic needs, they force the empath to do what they want. This slowly takes away the empath’s self and freedom.

These hidden tricks can deeply hurt the empath. They often give up a lot for the greater good, hoping for a little kindness in return17. This makes them easy targets for the narcissist’s abuse.

narcissist manipulation

It’s important for empaths to see and fight against the narcissist’s hidden tactics. Setting clear boundaries can shield them from being manipulated and abused16. Building their own confidence and worth, not needing the narcissist’s okay, helps them take back their power and freedom1716.

Can an Empath Become a Narcissist?

Many think an empath can turn into a narcissist. But, empaths and narcissists are really different at their core. These differences are deep and hard to change18. Narcissists fear being left alone more than empaths fear them. They stick with empaths because they see them as sources of love and kindness18. Narcissists also envy empaths for their real feelings and connections with others18.

Empaths might act a bit narcissistic when they’re hurt or overwhelmed. They might get aggressive, selfish, or have trouble setting limits18. But, this is usually just a short-term reaction. Their true nature of caring and wanting to help others stays strong, even if they act differently for a while18.

As empaths heal and learn more about themselves, they’re less likely to stay in bad relationships with narcissists18. They can stand up to narcissists by loving themselves and not letting them control them18. Super empaths can even break a narcissist’s control with love and strength18. If empaths spot manipulation early, they can plan to get away from narcissists successfully18.

It’s key to know that an empath’s true nature and values won’t change into those of a narcissist. Even if they act differently sometimes, their focus on others and kindness stays with them.

“True empaths vibrate at higher levels of joy, while narcissists vibrate lower in anger, jealousy, and rage18. Super empaths who are authentically powerful and whole can repel narcissists due to their high vibration levels18.”

In the end, while empaths might act a bit narcissistic at times, it’s wrong to think they can fully become narcissists. Their core personality and values are too strong to change so much.

Being in a relationship with a narcissist is tough for an empath. About 6.2% of people have Narcissistic Personality Disorder. They need constant attention and admiration. Empaths, being very caring, can understand others’ feelings well19.

Mindful Communication

Empaths need to talk carefully with narcissists. They are very sensitive to criticism and don’t like to take blame19. Talking with empathy helps empaths deal with these tricky situations better.

Setting Healthy Boundaries

It’s key to set clear boundaries to avoid being used by narcissists19. Empaths find it hard because they care a lot and may have been hurt before. But, it’s crucial for their mental health20.

Self-Care for Empaths

Empaths should focus on taking care of themselves19. Doing things that make them feel good is important. Getting help from friends, family, or therapists is also a good idea20.

For a healthy relationship with a narcissist, respect, understanding, and talking things out are key19. With the right steps, empaths can stay emotionally safe in these tough situations21.

Empath and Narcissist Relationship

“Empaths are often taken advantage of by narcissistic individuals they attract due to their empathic and compassionate nature.”19

Knowing about empaths and narcissists helps. Using strategies for better communication, setting boundaries, and self-care helps empaths handle these relationships better192021.

Conclusion

The relationship between an empath and a narcissist is complex and often toxic. At first, they may seem like perfect opposites. But, the empath’s kind nature and wish to help the narcissist can lead to emotional control and abuse22. Knowing how empaths and narcissists act can help empaths protect themselves22.

Setting clear boundaries, talking clearly, and taking care of oneself are key for empaths in these tough situations23. These steps are vital for staying safe and healthy in such relationships23.

Important lessons from this look into empath-narcissist relationships are clear. Recognizing the narcissist’s lack of empathy22 and the empath’s emotional drain23 are crucial. Also, the journey of self-discovery and healing is vital for empaths23.

By focusing on their emotional health, empaths can grow stronger and wiser after leaving these bad relationships23. They become more confident and resilient in how they connect with others in the future.

The complex nature of empath-narcissist relationships shows how important self-awareness and setting boundaries are. Embracing personal growth and healing is key. By understanding these challenges, empaths can protect their emotional health and build better relationships ahead. Comment below and explain what you learned from can an empath become a narcissist?

FAQ

Can an empath become a narcissist?

It’s a myth that an empath can turn into a narcissist. Empaths and narcissists are very different at their core. While empaths feel deeply what others feel, narcissists don’t care much about others’ feelings. Sometimes, empaths might act like narcissists when they’re really hurt or overwhelmed, but this is just a short-term thing.

What are the defining characteristics of empaths and narcissists?

Empaths feel others’ emotions deeply and are very caring. They like to help and understand others. On the other hand, narcissists think very highly of themselves and need lots of praise. They don’t really care about others’ feelings and can be mean and manipulative.

What is the allure between an empath and a narcissist?

The mix of an empath and a narcissist can be very interesting. The empath likes the narcissist’s confidence and charm. The narcissist sees the empath as a way to get attention and feel important. But, this mix can turn bad fast.

What is the difference between cognitive and affective empathy?

Cognitive empathy means understanding someone’s thoughts and feelings without feeling them yourself. Narcissists are good at this and use it to control people. Affective empathy is feeling and sharing others’ emotions. Empaths are great at this, which helps them connect deeply with others.

How do narcissists use their apparent insightfulness to manipulate empaths?

Narcissists seem to really get people, making empaths feel seen and valued. This comes from mirroring others and understanding them well. By acting caring, narcissists can trick empaths into trusting them.

What are some of the subtle displays of narcissistic superiority?

Underneath their nice exterior, narcissists believe they’re better than everyone else. They show this by putting others down, making big general statements, and gossiping. These actions hint at their true self-centered nature.

How do narcissists react to criticism and negative feedback?

Narcissists need lots of praise to feel good about themselves. So, they get very upset by any criticism. They might get angry, pull away, or defend themselves too much. This shows they’re likely a narcissist.

How do narcissists use a victim mentality to avoid responsibility?

Narcissists often act like victims to avoid blame for their mistakes. They can’t own up to their actions because it would hurt their ego. Instead, they blame others to keep their ego safe.

What are some of the covert manipulation tactics used by narcissists against empaths?

Narcissists use sneaky ways to control people, like gaslighting and emotional blackmail. Gaslighting makes empaths doubt their own feelings and memories. Emotional blackmail uses the empath’s kindness against them.

How can empaths navigate relationships with narcissists and protect their emotional well-being?

Being with a narcissist is hard for empaths. They should talk clearly, know the narcissist can’t handle criticism, and set clear boundaries. Taking care of themselves and getting support from friends or professionals is key.

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  11. Narcissistic Victim Syndrome: What The Heck Is That? – https://narcissisticbehavior.net/narcissistic-victim-syndrome-what-the-heck-is-that/
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  23. 10 Stages Of The Relationship Between A Narcissist And An Empath – https://www.relrules.com/10-stages-of-the-relationship-between-a-narcissist-and-an-empath/

Author

  • Fahim chughtai

    Fahim Chughtai is a leading expert in narcissism and a seasoned psychologist specializing in narcissistic abuse. He is the author of the highly popular newsletter, Narcissist Hunter, where he guides individuals on their healing journey from narcissistic abuse. With over a decade of experience, Fahim is dedicated to helping people understand and recover from the damaging effects of narcissism.

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