How to Make a Narcissist Obsessed with You

Fahim chughtai
14 Min Read

Ever wondered why narcissists are so captivating? Their charm and confidence are hard to resist. But their self-centeredness and need for admiration can be overwhelming. It’s tempting to think about making a narcissist obsessed with you, especially if you’re in a relationship. So let’s dicuss how to make a narcissist obsessed with you.

But, it’s important to think about the risks. Narcissistic obsession is not about caring for you. It’s about controlling and manipulating you. This can lead to toxic relationships and emotional abuse.

Narcissists seek admiration and control. Their obsession is a way to keep power and feel validated12. It’s key to understand this before trying to make a narcissist obsessed with you.

Narcissists are deeply insecure and need constant praise1. Their relationships go through cycles of idealization, devaluation, and discarding2. Keeping a healthy distance and setting clear boundaries is vital in these relationships.

Key Takeaways

  • Narcissistic obsession is about control and manipulation, not genuine care.
  • Narcissists crave admiration, validation, and a sense of superiority.
  • Maintaining boundaries and self-worth is essential when dealing with narcissists.
  • Tactics like ignoring, acting confidently, and showcasing disinterest can provoke a narcissist’s obsession.
  • Ending a relationship with a narcissist can trigger stalking and hoovering behaviors.

Understanding Narcissistic Obsession – How To Make a Narcissist Obsessed With You

Narcissists always need admiration and control3. They act obsessively in many areas, like work, self-image, and love3. They believe they are superior and try to prove it through their achievements and relationships3.

Narcissists Crave Admiration and Control

For narcissists, making friends is key to look good and feel important3. They see friends as a way to boost their ego and hide their fears3. They want to show off by getting what they want, making others feel less important3.

Obsession is about Manipulation, Not Genuine Care

Narcissists live in their own world, always trying to be on top3. They see their partners as part of themselves, helping to keep up their image3. If they can’t control someone they want, they become obsessed, seeing it as a sign of their own weakness3.

Understanding narcissistic traits and their reasons for being obsessed is key3. Keeping distance, responding carefully, and having a strong support group can help protect you3.

“Narcissists crave admiration and control, and their obsession is driven by a need for validation, not genuine care.”

Narcissistic Personality TraitsImpacts on Relationships
Grandiose self-imageConstant need for validation
Exploitative behaviorManipulation of partners
Lack of empathyDisregard for partner’s needs
Idealization and devaluationEmotional rollercoaster for partners

Knowing how narcissistic obsession works helps you deal with these complex relationships better3. Getting support and setting healthy boundaries are important steps against a narcissist’s obsession3.

For more help and advice on dealing with narcissistic relationships, check out Narcissism Exposed4.

Considerations Before Attempting to Make a Narcissist Obsess Over You

Before trying to make a narcissist obsess over you, know the risks. Trying to control their feelings can lead to emotional abuse and toxic relationships5. Narcissists often struggle to form deep connections, and their love is shallow5. To know if they truly love you, look at their actions and if they put your needs first5.

Risks of Toxic Dynamics and Emotional Abuse

Narcissists see love as a way to boost their self-esteem, leading to toxic relationships5. They may find it hard to empathize and keep lasting relationships5. Even with therapy, they might still struggle to support their partners emotionally5.

Developing Healthy Boundaries and Self-Worth

Focus on setting boundaries and building your self-worth instead5. While some narcissists might do well in short-term dating, they often struggle in long-term relationships5. Partners with narcissistic traits can still form real connections, but those with NPD may find it hard5.

Narcissists can learn to love and maintain healthy relationships through therapy5. But, the journey is tough, and the risks of emotional abuse and toxic dynamics are high5.

narcissistic obsession

Stay healthy by setting clear boundaries and valuing yourself6. Confronting a narcissist with facts and staying calm can expose their toxic behavior6. But, it’s important not to get emotionally or practically tied to them6.

Validate their Superiority

Showing a narcissist they’re better than others can draw them in. They might put down their partner to feel superior1. By praising their big achievements, you meet their need for admiration.

Confirm their Uniqueness

Narcissists have trouble connecting deeply with others. They feel they’re special and entitled7. Making them feel unique can attract them.

Applaud their Achievements

Narcissists crave constant praise and attention. Praising their wins can keep them interested in you2. But, always keep your own boundaries to avoid being controlled.

narcissist obsession

Narcissist Attraction TechniquesDescription
Projection of AdmirationTapping into the narcissist’s craving for validation and constant need for admiration.
Validating SuperiorityReinforcing the narcissist’s grandiose self-image and applauding their achievements.
Confirming UniquenessEmphasizing the narcissist’s perceived specialness and uniqueness.
Applauding AchievementsShowering the narcissist with praise and admiration for their accomplishments.

“Narcissists thrive on attention and admiration; they constantly seek validation of their self-worth through superficial attention and praise.”7

While these methods can grab a narcissist’s attention, remember to keep your boundaries. Be careful and prioritize your own well-being when dealing with narcissists.

Maintaining Mystery

Keeping a sense of mystery can draw a narcissist’s attention. Narcissists are often drawn to the unknown and the8. This lets them project their fantasies and feel in control. Being unpredictable and independent can keep a narcissist interested.

Being Unpredictable

Narcissists love to control their partners. By changing our responses, we can upset their need for control8. This mystery and exclusivity can make them feel special8.

Self-Sufficiency

Those with an avoidant attachment style value independence9. Showing we can take care of ourselves can intrigue a narcissist. This challenges their control and keeps us independent9.

Independence

Not chasing a narcissist can attract their attention9. Narcissists love the chase. By not chasing, we create distance that interests them9. This requires patience and letting them come to us.

maintaining mystery

By being mysterious, unpredictable, self-sufficient, and independent, we can capture a narcissist’s attention. But, remember, this can be emotionally draining.

“Maintaining secrecy allows narcissists to avoid being held accountable for their actions and to maintain power and control over their partners.”8

It’s key to prioritize our well-being and set boundaries to avoid narcissistic obsession.

Understanding narcissistic behavior is key if you’re in a relationship with one10. Narcissists often see themselves as heroes or victims, always seeking validation. This comes from deep-seated vulnerabilities and insecurities, hidden behind a mask of confidence and superiority10. They use power to control others in arguments, showing their need to dominate and feel superior10.

Arguments with narcissists are about winning, not finding a solution. They see these battles as a way to assert their dominance and control, with winning being the only goal10.

10 Dealing with a narcissist can be draining, both emotionally and mentally. It’s important to take care of yourself and seek support when needed. This can be in personal relationships, at work, or in other situations where narcissistic behavior is present10. Building emotional resilience is key to protect yourself from their manipulation.

10 Setting clear boundaries is crucial to protect your mental health and self-respect. These boundaries should cover physical, emotional, and conversational aspects10. Getting help from professionals or trusted friends is also vital. They can provide strategies to deal with the challenges of narcissistic relationships.

10 It’s important to address strawmanning by redirecting the conversation to the real issue. Dr. Craig Malkin suggests that a moderate level of narcissism in teens can lead to better relationships and less anxiety and depression11.

11 Research shows that encouraging narcissists to be more caring can reduce their narcissism. A 2008 survey found that only 1.7% of employers fairly investigated workplace bullying and took action. Yet, 24% of employers did nothing but fired the victim.

11 Using “we” in communication with narcissists can positively influence their behavior. It makes them more willing to help others.

navigating narcissistic relationships

Conclusion

Making a narcissist obsess over you might seem interesting at first. But, it’s important to be careful and think clearly about it. Narcissistic obsession is not about real care. It’s about wanting control12, and it can lead to harmful situations and emotional abuse13.

The best way is to work on setting healthy boundaries and boosting your self-worth. If needed, get professional help13. By understanding narcissistic behavior and keeping your sense of self, you can handle these situations better. This way, you prevent the narcissist from controlling you12.

Remember, avoiding emotional abuse and unhealthy situations is key. Instead, focus on a healthy way to deal with narcissistic relationships. Set clear boundaries, take care of yourself, and get help when you need it1312.

FAQ

What is narcissistic obsession?

Narcissistic obsession isn’t about real care. It’s about wanting control and to manipulate others. They see people as parts of themselves, needing constant praise to keep their ego up.

What are the risks of trying to make a narcissist obsess over you?

Trying to get a narcissist to obsess over you can be very harmful. It can lead to toxic relationships, emotional abuse, and losing who you are. Always keep your own boundaries and self-respect when dealing with a narcissist.

How can you attract a narcissist’s attention?

Show admiration to grab their attention. Narcissists love to be praised and feel special. By praising their achievements and making them feel unique, you can catch their eye.

How can maintaining a sense of mystery attract a narcissist?

Narcissists are drawn to the unknown. Being unpredictable and independent can make them curious. This keeps them interested in trying to figure you out and control you.

How can you navigate a relationship with a narcissist?

The best way is to set healthy boundaries and work on your self-worth. If needed, seek professional help. Understanding narcissistic behavior and keeping your sense of self can help you deal with these relationships better.

  1. How To Make the Narcissist Obsessed with You – https://medium.com/@narcfree3/how-to-make-the-narcissist-obsessed-with-you-611568ee9aa5
  2. How To make a Narcissist Obsessed With You? – https://thenarcissisticlife.com/how-to-make-a-narcissist-obsessed-with-you/
  3. Narcissistic Obsession: Is It Love? Or Is It Something Else? – https://ebjohnson.medium.com/narcissistic-obsession-is-it-love-or-is-it-something-else-7689fdd16bb6
  4. OCPD Support Group-Differences between Narcissism and Obsessive-compulsive personalities – https://www.tapatalk.com/groups/ocpd/differences-between-narcissism-and-obsessive-compu-t7172.html
  5. Can a Narcissist Love? – https://www.verywellmind.com/can-a-narcissist-love-7112051
  6. How To Expose A Narcissist Without Looking Like The Crazy One | Melanie Tonia Evans – https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-expose-a-narcissist-without-looking-like-the-crazy-one/
  7. 9 Simple Tips To Make A Narcissist Obsessed With You – narcissismguide.com – https://narcissismguide.com/how-to-make-a-narcissist-obsessed-with-you/
  8. Unpacking the Deceptive Tactics of Narcissists: How Compartmentalization Maintains Control in… – https://medium.com/illumination/unpacking-the-deceptive-tactics-of-narcissists-how-compartmentalization-maintains-control-in-c0d1e6bdc52d
  9. 14 Ways How to Get an Avoidant to Chase You – https://www.marriage.com/advice/relationship/how-to-get-an-avoidant-to-chase-you/
  10. Tactics to Put a Narcissist in their Place – Lilach Bullock: Your Guide To Digital Marketing, Tools and Growth – https://www.lilachbullock.com/narcissist-in-place/
  11. How To Win With A Narcissist: 5 Secrets Backed By Research – Barking Up The Wrong Tree – https://bakadesuyo.com/2017/10/how-to-win-with-a-narcissist/
  12. Signs a Narcissist Wants Your Attention: Decode Mind-Games — Judge Anthony – https://www.judgeanthony.com/blog/signs-a-narcissist-wants-your-attention
  13. How To Live With A Narcissist – https://mensgroup.com/how-to-live-with-a-narcissist/

Author

  • Fahim chughtai

    Fahim Chughtai is a leading expert in narcissism and a seasoned psychologist specializing in narcissistic abuse. He is the author of the highly popular newsletter, Narcissist Hunter, where he guides individuals on their healing journey from narcissistic abuse. With over a decade of experience, Fahim is dedicated to helping people understand and recover from the damaging effects of narcissism.

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