How To Deal With Narcissist Wife? 7 Secrets That Work

How to deal with narcissist wife? 7 secrets that work – this search represents the desperate plea of thousands of men who feel trapped, isolated, and unheard in marriages that are slowly destroying their mental health and sense of reality. After working with countless male survivors through NarcissismExposed.com as a Certified Narcissistic Abuse Specialist, I can tell you that understanding these seven proven strategies will either save your sanity or give you the strength to reclaim your life from a relationship that's designed to break you.

The brutal reality is that narcissistic wives use sophisticated manipulation tactics specifically designed to exploit men's protective instincts, financial responsibilities, and social conditioning about masculinity. This creates a perfect storm where male victims feel trapped by both their abuser's manipulation and society's expectation that men should be able to “handle” difficult relationships.

What makes narcissistic wives particularly dangerous is their ability to weaponize social expectations about gender roles, often positioning themselves as victims while systematically destroying their husband's self-esteem, financial security, and social connections. Unlike male narcissists who often use obvious aggression, narcissistic wives excel at covert manipulation that leaves their husbands questioning their own sanity.

The seven secrets I'm about to share aren't about fixing your wife or saving your marriage – they're about protecting yourself, maintaining your mental health, and preserving your ability to make clear decisions about your future. These strategies work because they're based on understanding narcissistic psychology rather than hoping for change that will never come.

Understanding the Unique Challenge: Why Dealing with a Narcissist Wife Is Different

Before revealing how to deal with narcissist wife: 7 secrets that work, it's crucial to understand why narcissistic wives present unique challenges that differ from other forms of narcissistic abuse. This understanding validates your experience and explains why traditional relationship advice fails so spectacularly in these situations.

Narcissistic wives operate within a social context that automatically grants them victim credibility while casting suspicion on men who claim to be abused. This social dynamic becomes one of their most powerful weapons, allowing them to isolate their husbands while building networks of supporters who validate their victim narrative.

The Gender Manipulation Factor

Narcissistic wives exploit societal gender expectations to maintain control and avoid accountability. They understand that society is more likely to believe a woman claiming abuse than a man, and they weaponize this bias to their advantage.

This manifests as:

• Using tears and emotional displays to gain sympathy from friends, family, and professionals
• Positioning themselves as victims of their husband's “emotional unavailability” or “anger issues”
• Exploiting the protective instincts that most men have toward women, even abusive ones
• Using children as weapons while positioning themselves as the “better parent”
• Leveraging divorce courts' historical bias toward mothers in custody disputes

Research from the National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey shows that male victims of psychological abuse are significantly less likely to be believed or receive support, creating additional layers of isolation and trauma that narcissistic wives expertly exploit.

The Covert Manipulation Advantage

Unlike male narcissists who often rely on obvious intimidation and control, narcissistic wives typically use covert manipulation tactics that are harder to identify and easier to dismiss. This covert approach makes it more difficult for male victims to recognize the abuse or convince others of their experiences.

Common covert tactics include:

• Passive-aggressive punishment through silent treatment and emotional withdrawal
• Gaslighting that makes husbands question their memory and perceptions
• Financial manipulation disguised as “being responsible with money”
• Social isolation presented as “protecting the family” from negative influences
• Sexual manipulation used as reward and punishment for compliance
• Emotional terrorism through threats of suicide, self-harm, or taking the children

Understanding these dynamics is the first step in learning how to deal with narcissist wife: 7 secrets that work, because protection requires recognizing the specific weapons being used against you.

Secret #1: How to Deal with Narcissist Wife Through Strategic Emotional Detachment

The first and most crucial secret in how to deal with narcissist wife: 7 secrets that work involves developing strategic emotional detachment that protects your psychological wellbeing without completely shutting down your emotional capacity.

Strategic emotional detachment means creating internal distance from your wife's emotional manipulation while maintaining your ability to function in the relationship and protect any children involved. This isn't about becoming cold or uncaring – it's about developing psychological armor that prevents her manipulation from destabilizing your mental health.

The Gray Rock Method Adaptation

The gray rock method, when adapted for marriage, involves becoming as uninteresting and non-reactive as possible during your wife's manipulation attempts. This strategy works because narcissists feed on emotional reactions, and reducing your responsiveness decreases the psychological reward they receive from their behavior.

Effective gray rock techniques for husbands include:

• Responding to emotional manipulation with neutral, factual statements
• Avoiding defending yourself against false accusations or gaslighting attempts
• Maintaining calm, monotone responses during her emotional outbursts
• Refusing to engage in circular arguments or dramatic conversations
• Limiting sharing of personal information that could be used against you later

Important considerations:

• Gray rock should be implemented gradually to avoid triggering escalation
• This technique protects you but may increase her manipulation attempts initially
• Document any escalation in behavior after implementing gray rock
• Have safety plans in place if her behavior becomes threatening

Emotional Boundary Creation

Creating internal emotional boundaries involves developing the ability to observe your wife's behavior without allowing it to dictate your emotional state or self-worth. This psychological skill is essential for maintaining sanity in narcissistic relationships.

Boundary creation strategies include:

• Developing internal mantras that remind you her behavior reflects her issues, not your worth
• Creating mental distance by viewing her manipulation as symptoms of her disorder
• Practicing emotional regulation techniques that don't depend on her behavior
• Building self-validation skills that don't require her approval or acknowledgment
• Maintaining perspective by remembering your own values and goals

One husband shared: “Once I learned to see her rages as temper tantrums rather than legitimate relationship issues, I stopped taking them personally. It didn't stop the behavior, but it stopped destroying my peace of mind.”

Secret #2: Financial Protection Strategies in How to Deal with Narcissist Wife

The second critical element in how to deal with narcissist wife: 7 secrets that work involves protecting your financial assets and stability from manipulation, exploitation, and potential future legal proceedings.

Narcissistic wives often use financial control as both a manipulation tool and a means of ensuring their husband cannot leave the relationship. They may overspend, hide assets, damage credit, or create financial chaos that makes independence seem impossible.

Asset Protection and Documentation

Protecting your financial future requires careful documentation and strategic asset management that prepares you for various scenarios while maintaining transparency in your marriage.

Essential financial protection steps include:

• Creating detailed records of all assets, debts, and financial transactions
• Maintaining separate accounts for personal expenses and emergency funds
• Documenting any financial abuse, overspending, or manipulation attempts
• Consulting with financial planners who understand high-conflict divorce scenarios
• Protecting your credit by monitoring reports and limiting joint accounts when possible

Legal considerations:

• Understand your state's laws regarding marital property and asset division
• Consult with attorneys who specialize in high-conflict divorces
• Document any attempts to hide, steal, or manipulate joint assets
• Keep records of income, expenses, and financial contributions to the household
• Protect retirement accounts and investments from impulsive decisions

Preventing Financial Manipulation

Narcissistic wives often use money as a weapon to maintain control and punish non-compliance with their demands. Understanding and preventing these tactics is crucial for maintaining your financial security.

Common financial manipulation tactics include:

• Overspending to create financial stress and dependency
• Hiding purchases or creating secret debts in joint names
• Using children's needs to justify excessive or unnecessary expenses
• Threatening expensive legal proceedings to maintain control
• Sabotaging career opportunities that might increase your independence

Protection strategies:

• Limit access to major accounts and credit lines
• Require joint approval for significant purchases
• Monitor all accounts regularly for unauthorized transactions
• Create separate emergency funds she doesn't know about
• Work with financial advisors who understand narcissistic abuse dynamics

Secret #3: Documentation Techniques for How to Deal with Narcissist Wife

The third essential secret in how to deal with narcissist wife: 7 secrets that work involves systematic documentation of narcissistic behavior patterns that can protect you legally, validate your experiences, and provide evidence if you need to involve authorities or courts.

Documentation serves multiple crucial purposes: it helps you maintain perspective on reality when gaslighting becomes intense, provides evidence for legal proceedings, and validates your experiences when others question your perceptions.

Strategic Evidence Gathering

Effective documentation requires systematic recording of incidents, patterns, and evidence that captures the reality of narcissistic abuse in ways that others can understand and verify.

Documentation best practices include:

• Recording dates, times, and detailed descriptions of abusive incidents
• Saving threatening or manipulative text messages, emails, and voicemails
• Taking photographs of any property damage or physical evidence
• Recording her behavior around children if custody becomes an issue
• Keeping medical records of stress-related health issues
• Documenting financial abuse and unauthorized spending

Technology considerations:

• Use apps designed for abuse documentation that time-stamp entries
• Store evidence in cloud services she cannot access
• Create backup copies of all important documents and evidence
• Use voice recording apps during conversations (check local laws first)
• Photograph important documents and store copies separately

Building Your Case File

Whether you stay in the marriage or eventually leave, having a comprehensive record of narcissistic abuse patterns provides protection and validation that can be crucial for your future wellbeing and legal standing.

Essential documentation categories:

• Emotional and psychological abuse incidents
• Financial manipulation and unauthorized spending
• Parenting issues and child-related manipulation
• Threats, intimidation, or dangerous behavior
• Gaslighting attempts and reality distortion
• Social manipulation and isolation tactics

Legal preparation benefits:

• Provides evidence for protective orders if needed
• Documents patterns for custody evaluations
• Supports claims of emotional abuse in divorce proceedings
• Validates your experiences to attorneys and mental health professionals
• Creates timeline of escalation that demonstrates ongoing abuse

One survivor noted: “I wish I had started documenting sooner. When I finally showed my attorney two years' worth of her threatening messages and financial manipulation, he said it was the strongest case he'd seen for emotional abuse.”

Secret #4: How to Deal with Narcissist Wife Through Support Network Development

The fourth crucial secret in how to deal with narcissist wife: 7 secrets that work involves building and maintaining support networks that can provide validation, practical assistance, and emotional stability during your most challenging moments.

Narcissistic wives systematically work to isolate their husbands from friends, family, and professional support systems. Rebuilding and protecting these connections is essential for maintaining perspective and accessing help when needed.

Rebuilding Damaged Relationships

Many men in narcissistic marriages find that their wife has systematically damaged their relationships with friends and family through manipulation, triangulation, and false narratives. Rebuilding these connections requires patience, honesty, and strategic communication.

Relationship rebuilding strategies include:

• Reaching out to old friends and family members with honest explanations
• Acknowledging that your wife may have poisoned these relationships with false stories
• Being patient with people who may be confused about the situation
• Providing specific examples of manipulation rather than general complaints
• Asking for emotional support rather than advice about staying or leaving

Communication approaches:

• “I realize my wife may have told you things about our marriage that aren't accurate”
• “I've been isolated and need to rebuild the friendships that matter to me”
• “I'm dealing with some serious relationship issues and could use your support”
• “Can we talk privately? There are things happening in my marriage that I need to discuss”

Professional Support Systems

Professional support becomes crucial when dealing with narcissistic wives because the manipulation is often too sophisticated for friends and family to understand or believe.

Essential professional support includes:

• Individual therapy with specialists in narcissistic abuse
• Legal consultation with attorneys experienced in high-conflict divorces
• Financial planning with professionals who understand abuse dynamics
• Medical care for stress-related health issues
• Support groups specifically for male survivors of narcissistic abuse

Finding qualified professionals:

• Look for therapists trained in narcissistic abuse and personality disorders
• Seek attorneys who specialize in high-conflict divorces and parental alienation
• Find support groups that understand male victims' unique challenges
• Consider online support communities when local resources aren't available
• Ask professionals directly about their experience with narcissistic abuse cases

Secret #5: Child Protection Strategies in How to Deal with Narcissist Wife

The fifth critical secret in how to deal with narcissist wife: 7 secrets that work focuses on protecting your children from narcissistic manipulation while preserving your relationship with them despite your wife's attempts at parental alienation.

Narcissistic mothers often use children as weapons, sources of narcissistic supply, and tools for manipulating their husbands. Protecting your children requires understanding these dynamics while developing strategies that prioritize their emotional wellbeing.

Recognizing Parental Alienation

Parental alienation involves systematic manipulation designed to damage the relationship between children and the targeted parent. Narcissistic wives often excel at subtle alienation tactics that are difficult to prove but devastating in their impact.

Common alienation tactics include:

• Subtly undermining your authority and parenting decisions
• Creating loyalty conflicts where children feel they must choose sides
• Sharing inappropriate adult information that positions her as the victim
• Sabotaging your individual time and relationship with the children
• Using guilt and emotional manipulation to turn children against you
• Rewriting family history to minimize your role or contributions

Protection strategies:

• Document all instances of parental alienation with dates and specifics
• Maintain consistent, loving relationships with your children regardless of her behavior
• Avoid speaking negatively about their mother, even when she deserves criticism
• Create positive individual experiences with each child when possible
• Teach children emotional regulation skills and healthy boundary setting
• Consider working with custody evaluators who understand parental alienation

Age-Appropriate Protection

Protecting children from narcissistic manipulation requires strategies tailored to their developmental stage while maintaining their sense of security and family stability.

For younger children (ages 5-10):

• Focus on providing emotional stability and consistency
• Teach them that they're not responsible for adult emotions or problems
• Create safe spaces where they can express feelings without judgment
• Maintain routines and predictability in your interactions
• Avoid exposing them to adult conflicts or manipulation

For tweens and teens (ages 11-18):

• Provide age-appropriate education about healthy versus unhealthy relationships
• Teach them to recognize manipulation tactics without directly criticizing their mother
• Support their individual interests and independence
• Create opportunities for honest conversation about family dynamics
• Help them develop critical thinking skills about emotional manipulation

Documentation for custody protection:

• Record instances where children are used as messengers or spies
• Document emotional distress in children following time with their mother
• Keep records of school performance, behavioral changes, and therapeutic needs
• Photograph or record evidence of children being exposed to inappropriate content
• Maintain detailed logs of your involvement in children's activities and care

Secret #6: How to Deal with Narcissist Wife Through Strategic Communication

The sixth essential secret in how to deal with narcissist wife: 7 secrets that work involves developing communication strategies that protect you from manipulation while maintaining necessary family functioning.

Traditional relationship communication advice fails completely with narcissistic wives because they use communication as a weapon rather than a tool for understanding and connection. Effective communication with narcissists requires entirely different approaches focused on protection rather than intimacy.

The BIFF Method for Narcissistic Wives

The BIFF method (Brief, Informative, Friendly, Firm) provides a communication framework that minimizes opportunities for manipulation while maintaining necessary information exchange.

BIFF communication principles:

• Brief: Keep communications short and to the point
• Informative: Stick to facts and avoid emotional language
• Friendly: Maintain neutral, business-like tone
• Firm: Set clear boundaries and don't negotiate basic respect

Practical BIFF examples:

• Instead of: “You always twist everything I say and make me feel crazy”
• Use: “I won't continue this conversation if personal attacks continue”
• Instead of: “Why can't you just be reasonable about the kids' schedule?”
• Use: “The pickup time is 6 PM as we previously agreed”

Avoiding Communication Traps

Narcissistic wives set communication traps designed to provoke emotional reactions, gather ammunition, or create opportunities for manipulation. Recognizing and avoiding these traps is crucial for protecting your mental health.

Common communication traps include:

• Circular arguments that never reach resolution
• Emotional baiting designed to provoke defensive reactions
• False emergencies that demand immediate attention and compliance
• Gaslighting conversations that make you question your memory or sanity
• Triangulation where she brings others into your private disagreements

Protection strategies:

• Refuse to engage in conversations when you're emotionally triggered
• Set time limits for difficult discussions
• Insist on written communication for important topics
• Document conversations that involve threats or manipulation
• Walk away from conversations that become abusive or manipulative

Boundaries for healthy communication:

• “I won't discuss this when voices are raised”
• “Let's put this in writing so we both have clarity”
• “I need time to think about this before responding”
• “This conversation isn't productive, let's revisit it later”
• “I won't accept being spoken to disrespectfully”

Secret #7: Exit Planning for How to Deal with Narcissist Wife

The seventh and most crucial secret in how to deal with narcissist wife: 7 secrets that work involves developing comprehensive exit planning that prepares you for the possibility of leaving the relationship while protecting your assets, children, and safety.

Exit planning doesn't mean you have to leave immediately, but having a plan provides options and reduces the panic that often keeps men trapped in abusive marriages. This preparation is essential whether you stay and try to manage the relationship or decide that leaving is necessary for your wellbeing.

Comprehensive Safety and Exit Planning

Exit planning for men dealing with narcissistic wives requires addressing financial, legal, emotional, and logistical considerations that are often overlooked in traditional divorce planning.

Essential exit planning components include:

• Securing important documents and making copies
• Building financial independence and emergency funds
• Consulting with attorneys about custody and asset protection
• Identifying safe places to stay if you need to leave quickly
• Developing support systems that understand narcissistic abuse
• Creating safety plans for various escalation scenarios

Legal preparation strategies:

• Research divorce laws in your state, especially regarding custody and asset division
• Consult with multiple attorneys to find one experienced with high-conflict cases
• Understand your rights regarding children, property, and financial support
• Document evidence of abuse, manipulation, and unfit parenting
• Consider mediation alternatives that might reduce conflict and cost

Timing and Implementation

The decision to implement exit planning requires careful consideration of safety factors, children's wellbeing, and practical readiness for the challenges ahead.

Factors to consider:

• Your emotional and mental health stability
• Financial readiness for independent living
• Children's ages and adjustment capacity
• Evidence documentation completeness
• Support system strength and availability
• Safety concerns and escalation risks

Implementation steps:

• Secure important documents in safe locations
• Build financial independence gradually
• Strengthen relationships with supportive friends and family
• Complete legal consultations and understand your options
• Create detailed safety plans for various scenarios
• Prepare children age-appropriately if custody changes are likely

Warning signs that exit planning should become immediate action:

• Physical violence or credible threats of violence
• Escalating manipulation of children or parental alienation
• Financial abuse that threatens your economic survival
• Mental health deterioration that affects your ability to function
• Isolation tactics that eliminate all support systems
• Any behavior that makes you fear for your safety or sanity

One survivor reflected: “Having an exit plan didn't mean I was definitely leaving, but it gave me back my sense of control and options. When I finally did leave, I was prepared instead of panicked, and that made all the difference in protecting both myself and my kids.”

The Implementation Reality: How to Deal with Narcissist Wife Safely

Understanding how to deal with narcissist wife: 7 secrets that work is only the beginning – successful implementation requires patience, consistency, and realistic expectations about both your wife's reactions and your own healing process.

The most important thing to understand is that these strategies are about protecting yourself and maintaining your sanity, not about changing your wife or fixing your marriage. Narcissistic personality disorder is a serious mental health condition that rarely responds to traditional relationship interventions.

Managing Escalation and Backlash

When you begin implementing these protective strategies, your narcissistic wife will likely escalate her manipulation tactics. This escalation is predictable and temporary, but it can be dangerous if you're not prepared for it.

Common escalation responses include:

• Increased emotional manipulation and guilt tactics
• Threats of divorce, suicide, or taking the children
• Ramping up of parental alienation efforts
• Financial retaliation and asset hiding
• Social manipulation to isolate you from support systems
• False accusations designed to damage your reputation

Managing escalation safely:

• Document all escalation behaviors with dates and details
• Inform your support system about increased manipulation attempts
• Have safety plans ready if threats become credible
• Consider temporary separation if escalation becomes dangerous
• Maintain boundaries despite increased pressure to abandon them
• Remember that escalation often indicates your strategies are working

Long-Term Perspective and Healing

Recovery from narcissistic abuse is a long-term process that continues even after implementing protective strategies. Understanding this helps set realistic expectations and maintain motivation during difficult periods.

The healing journey typically involves:

• Rebuilding self-esteem and confidence that was systematically destroyed
• Learning to trust your own perceptions after years of gaslighting
• Developing healthy relationship skills for future connections
• Processing trauma and grief related to the marriage's reality
• Building independence and identity separate from the abusive relationship
• Creating life goals and dreams that aren't centered on managing her behavior

Support for the healing process:

• Individual therapy with specialists in narcissistic abuse recovery
• Support groups for male survivors of narcissistic abuse
• Rebuilding friendships and family relationships damaged by the abuse
• Pursuing interests and goals that were neglected during the marriage
• Physical and mental health care to address abuse-related trauma
• Legal and financial planning for your future security

Key Takeaways: Mastering How to Deal with Narcissist Wife

Understanding how to deal with narcissist wife: 7 secrets that work provides essential tools for survival and protection, but implementation requires commitment, support, and realistic expectations about the challenges ahead.

Remember these crucial insights:

• Strategic emotional detachment protects your mental health without requiring you to become cold or unfeeling toward family responsibilities
• Financial protection and documentation are essential for both your current security and potential future legal proceedings
• Building support networks counters isolation and provides validation for experiences that others may not understand
• Child protection strategies require long-term thinking and patience to counteract parental alienation and manipulation
• Communication boundaries prevent manipulation while maintaining necessary family functioning
• Exit planning provides options and control regardless of whether you choose to stay or leave
• Implementation often triggers escalation which is temporary but requires safety planning and support

The path forward involves:

• Implementing these strategies gradually and consistently
• Building professional and personal support systems
• Prioritizing your own healing and wellbeing
• Protecting your children through education and stability
• Documenting abuse patterns for validation and legal protection
• Maintaining hope for your own future while releasing hope for her change

Understanding how to deal with narcissist wife: 7 secrets that work isn't about becoming manipulative yourself or engaging in psychological warfare. When men search for this information, they're seeking survival strategies for relationships that are systematically destroying their mental health and sense of reality. These seven secrets provide the tools needed to protect yourself, your children, and your future while navigating one of the most challenging relationship dynamics possible.

Your sanity, safety, and wellbeing matter. The strategies outlined here have helped thousands of men reclaim their lives, whether they chose to stay and protect themselves within the marriage or found the strength to leave and build healthier futures. Whatever path you choose, you deserve to be treated with basic human respect and dignity, and these tools can help you create that reality in your life.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is it possible to have a good marriage with a narcissistic wife?

A truly healthy, reciprocal marriage with someone who has narcissistic personality disorder is extremely unlikely due to the fundamental lack of empathy and inability to prioritize others' needs that characterizes the condition. However, some men find that implementing these protective strategies allows them to maintain stability while focusing on their children, career, or other life priorities. The key is understanding that you'll be managing a relationship rather than enjoying mutual love and support. Success is measured by your own wellbeing and peace of mind rather than traditional markers of marital happiness.

Will these strategies make my wife angry or cause her to escalate her behavior?

Yes, implementing boundaries and protection strategies typically triggers escalation in narcissistic behavior initially. This happens because you're removing sources of narcissistic supply and control that she's accustomed to having. The escalation is usually temporary and indicates that your boundaries are working. However, escalation can be dangerous, so it's crucial to have safety plans in place and implement changes gradually. Document any escalation carefully, as this behavior often reveals the true nature of the abuse more clearly than the subtle manipulation you may be used to experiencing.

Should I tell my wife I know she's a narcissist or confront her about her behavior?

Generally, no. Directly confronting a narcissist about their disorder or labeling their behavior typically results in intense retaliation, gaslighting, and escalated manipulation. Narcissists cannot accept criticism or accountability, so confrontation usually backfires and provides them with ammunition to use against you. Instead, focus on implementing protective strategies quietly while building your support systems and documentation. If you must address specific behaviors, use the BIFF communication method and focus on boundaries rather than diagnosis or character judgments.

How do I protect my children without poisoning them against their mother?

Protecting children from narcissistic manipulation requires a delicate balance of providing stability, teaching healthy boundaries, and avoiding parental alienation tactics yourself. Focus on being the stable, consistent parent while teaching children age-appropriate lessons about emotional regulation and healthy relationships. Document concerning behaviors for potential custody proceedings, but avoid speaking negatively about their mother directly. Instead, validate their feelings, teach them they're not responsible for adult emotions, and model healthy communication and boundary setting. Professional guidance from therapists experienced with narcissistic family dynamics can be invaluable.

When should I consider leaving versus trying to make the marriage work?

This decision depends on factors including physical safety, your mental health, the impact on your children, and your personal values and circumstances. Consider leaving if there's physical violence, if your mental health is deteriorating despite protective strategies, if your children are being significantly harmed, or if the relationship is preventing you from functioning in other areas of life. Some men choose to stay for practical reasons (children, finances, religious beliefs) while implementing protective strategies to maintain their wellbeing. The most important factor is whether you can maintain your physical and mental health within the relationship, even with boundaries in place.

How long does it take to see results from these strategies?

The timeline varies significantly depending on your situation and consistency in implementing the strategies. Some men report feeling more stable and in control within weeks of implementing emotional boundaries and gray rock techniques. However, full recovery from narcissistic abuse trauma often takes months or years, and you may see escalation in her behavior before improvement in your own wellbeing. Focus on small, measurable improvements in your own peace of mind, sleep quality, and ability to function rather than expecting rapid changes in her behavior, which is unlikely to occur regardless of your strategies.

Can these strategies work if my wife is seeing a therapist or getting treatment?

While it's positive that your wife is seeking professional help, narcissistic personality disorder has poor treatment outcomes, and many narcissists use therapy to become more sophisticated manipulators rather than genuinely changing. These protective strategies remain important regardless of her treatment status because they're about your wellbeing rather than her behavior. Continue implementing boundaries and documentation while hoping for the best but preparing for continued manipulation. Be aware that she may use therapy language and concepts to gaslight you or claim that you're the one with problems. Your own individual therapy is more important than her treatment for your healing and protection.