He pays for dinner, remembers your birthday, and tells everyone at the party what a wonderful partner he is. Then he comes home, and the warmth switches off. The same man who was generous in front of an audience becomes cold, critical, and cruel behind closed doors. If you have lived through that split, you are probably asking can a narcissist be a good person, and you are asking it because the answer matters for a real decision. Should you stay, should you trust the good moments, or should you accept that the kindness was never what it seemed? This article gives you the honest answer, without a verdict handed down from above and without pretending the question is simple. A narcissist is a person with a lasting pattern of grandiosity, a deep need for admiration, and low empathy, and that pattern is the thing you have to judge, not the label and not one good day.
- What Does It Mean To Be A Good Person
- What Is A Narcissist, Really
- Can A Narcissist Do Good Things
- Why Do Narcissists Act Good Sometimes
- Can A Narcissist Be A Good Person In A Relationship
- Can A Covert Narcissist Be A Good Person
- Can A Vulnerable Narcissist Be A Good Person
- Can A Malignant Narcissist Be A Good Person
- How Can You Tell Genuine Kindness From Performance
- Can A Narcissist Change To Be A Good Person
- How To Live With A Narcissistic Person
- Myths Vs Facts About Narcissists And Goodness
- The Honest Answer, In Short
- Frequently Asked Questions
Yes, a narcissist can do good things, and some can grow into kinder people over time, but a single kind act does not make someone a good person. Good character shows in consistent, unrewarded kindness, especially when no one is watching. Judge the pattern across months, not the performance of one good day.
Key Takeaways
- A narcissist can do good things. Doing good things and being a good person are not the same, and the difference is motive, consistency, and what happens when no one is watching.
- Narcissism is a spectrum. A person with a few narcissistic traits, a person with narcissistic personality disorder, and a healthy confident person are three different situations, and the answer changes with each one.
- The core problem is empathy. Most narcissists can understand what you feel, which is called cognitive empathy, but struggle to feel it with you, which is called emotional empathy, and that gap shapes everything else.
- Real change is possible but rare, slow, and hard to fake. It shows as consistent behaviour over months and years, with professional help, not as one apology or one good week.
- You do not need a final moral verdict on the person to make a good decision. Judge the pattern, set your boundaries, and decide what you will accept in your own life.
What Does It Mean To Be A Good Person
A good person is not someone who never makes a mistake. A good person is someone whose behaviour, taken as a whole, is kind, honest, and fair, even when kindness costs them something and even when nobody will ever know. That definition matters here, because the whole debate about whether a narcissist can be a good person turns on which meaning of good you use. If good means capable of a kind act, then yes, almost anyone qualifies, including people with serious personality problems. If good means a settled character, a person you can rely on to treat you well when it is inconvenient, when you are struggling, and when there is nothing in it for them, then the bar is higher, and that is the bar this article uses.
Think about the three qualities most people mean when they call someone good. First, empathy, the ability to understand another person’s feelings and to care about them. Second, consistency, doing the right thing in private the same way as in public. Third, accountability, owning harm, apologising sincerely, and changing the behaviour that caused it. A person can be charming, generous, and fun, and still fail all three. A person can also be difficult, blunt, and self centred at times, and still pass all three, because goodness is about how you treat people over time, not about how pleasant you are to be around.
This is why the question feels so confusing in real life. The narcissist in your life probably passes the first test in public and fails it in private. They are generous at the restaurant and cruel at home. They defend a stranger and humiliate their partner. That split is not a contradiction you have to solve. It is the pattern itself, and once you see it clearly, the question becomes much easier to answer for your own situation. Our guide on whether narcissists are bad people looks at the same question from the other side, and it reaches the same conclusion, judge the behaviour, not the label.
What Is A Narcissist, Really
A narcissist is a person whose personality is organised around protecting a fragile sense of self worth. Underneath the confidence, the boasting, and the need to be admired, there is usually a deep fear of being ordinary, rejected, or exposed as not enough. The grandiosity is the armour. The rage, the silent treatment, and the manipulation are what happen when the armour gets dented. The Mayo Clinic overview of narcissistic personality disorder describes it plainly, an unreasonably high sense of self importance, a need for excessive attention and admiration, troubled relationships, and a lack of empathy, with fragile self esteem hiding behind the mask of extreme confidence.
It helps to separate three things that get blurred together. First, narcissistic traits, which almost everyone shows sometimes, like wanting praise after a success or feeling envious of a rival. Second, narcissistic personality disorder, often shortened to NPD, which is a formal diagnosis in the DSM-5, the manual mental health professionals use. A person meets the diagnosis when they show at least five of nine specific traits, including a grandiose sense of self importance, fantasies of unlimited success, a belief that they are special, a need for excessive admiration, a sense of entitlement, taking advantage of others, a lack of empathy, envy, and arrogant attitudes. Third, healthy narcissism, which is confidence, pride in real achievements, and the ability to enjoy attention without exploiting anyone. Healthy narcissism is not a disorder. It is a normal part of a strong self image, and it is the reason some confident people can be both self assured and genuinely kind.
Only a qualified professional working directly with a person can diagnose narcissistic personality disorder. This article will not diagnose anyone in your life, and it will not diagnose you. What it will do is help you understand the pattern, so you can judge what you are actually living with. You can read the full list in our guide to the nine criteria for narcissistic personality disorder, which explains each one in plain language.
| Feature | Person with narcissistic traits | Person with narcissistic personality disorder |
|---|---|---|
| How often the pattern shows | Sometimes, under stress or in specific situations | Across most areas of life, for years, in many relationships |
| Empathy | Can be selfish at times, but can feel for others when it matters | Persistently low empathy, struggles to recognise or care about others’ feelings |
| Reaction to criticism | Defensive, but usually recovers and can apologise | Rage, silent treatment, revenge, or collapse that lasts for days |
| Relationships | Mostly stable, with occasional selfish behaviour | A repeated cycle of idealisation, devaluation, and discard |
| Self awareness | Can reflect and admit fault, at least sometimes | Rarely sees the pattern, usually blames other people |
| Change | Often improves with feedback and life experience | Change is slow, needs sustained professional help, and is uncommon |
| Can they be a good person | Often yes, if the traits are mild and they work on them | The question becomes harder, because the pattern itself keeps harming others |
Can A Narcissist Do Good Things
Yes, a narcissist can do good things, and anyone who says otherwise has probably never spent time with one. Narcissists can be generous, charming, funny, loyal to a cause, and deeply helpful, sometimes spectacularly so. They can donate money, volunteer, mentor a younger colleague, defend a friend in public, and remember exactly what you need when you are struggling. The good acts are real. The money really reaches the charity. The help really arrives. Pretending those acts did not happen will not protect you, because it leaves you unable to explain what you saw with your own eyes.
The honest question is not whether the good act happened. It is why it happened, and what happens next. A narcissist’s good acts usually fall into a few recognisable patterns. Sometimes the act is genuine in the moment, a real impulse of generosity that fades when the mood passes. Sometimes it is strategic, a way to win admiration, loyalty, or control. Sometimes it is a debt in disguise, a favour that will be collected later, with interest, usually at the worst possible moment. And sometimes it is reputation management, a public performance that buys the cover to behave badly in private. The same generous gesture can belong to any of these, and the only way to tell them apart is to watch what follows.
Here is a simple example. A narcissistic partner pays off your credit card debt as a surprise. That is a good act. If it comes with no strings, no reminders, and no change in how they treat you, it may be genuine generosity. If it comes with a speech about everything they do for you, repeated in every argument for the next two years, it was a purchase, not a gift. If it comes the day after a blow up, as a way to reset the argument without apologising, it was damage control. The act is the same. The meaning is completely different, and the meaning is what decides whether you are looking at a good person or a person doing a good thing for their own reasons.
This is also why one good act never cancels a pattern of harm. A person who is kind on Tuesday and cruel on Wednesday is not a good person having a bad day. They are a person whose kindness is conditional, and conditional kindness is not the same as character. Character is what someone does when kindness costs them, when they are tired, when they have been criticised, and when nobody is watching. That is the test, and it is a test you apply over months, not over one good weekend.
| Good acts | Good character |
|---|---|
| A single kind gesture, a gift, a donation, a favour | Kindness repeated over time, in public and in private |
| Often visible, often praised, often remembered | Often invisible, often unrewarded, often forgotten |
| Can be motivated by admiration, image, or control | Motivated by care for the other person, even at a cost |
| Disappears under stress, criticism, or boredom | Holds steady under stress, criticism, and boredom |
| Followed by reminders, scorekeeping, or demands | Followed by nothing, no debt, no speech, no collection |
| Makes the giver look good | Makes the other person’s life better |
Why Do Narcissists Act Good Sometimes
Narcissists act good sometimes for reasons that are easy to understand once you see the pattern plainly. The first reason is admiration. A narcissist needs other people to reflect back how special they are, and generous acts are one of the fastest ways to get that reflection. Applause, gratitude, and praise are the fuel, and a grand gesture buys a large amount of it at once. The second reason is image. A person who is known as generous, charming, and helpful is very hard to accuse of anything, and that reputation is useful protection. If everyone else thinks they are wonderful, your complaint sounds unbelievable, and they know it.
The third reason is control. Kindness creates obligation, and obligation creates leverage. A favour given today becomes a reason you cannot say no tomorrow. A gift given in public becomes a reason you cannot complain in private, because look at everything they do for you. The fourth reason is the false self, the polished public version of the person that hides a fragile and frightened inner self. The false self is not always a conscious lie. Many narcissists genuinely believe their own performance, at least while the applause is still ringing. And the fifth reason is the simplest one, and the one people forget. Sometimes they just feel like it. Narcissists are human beings, not machines, and human beings have mixed motives, good moods, and real moments of warmth. A moment of warmth does not erase the pattern, but it is still a real moment.
There is one more form of goodness worth naming, because it confuses people more than any other. Communal narcissism is a pattern where a person seeks admiration by being seen as the most helpful, caring, or moral person in the room. They volunteer the most, donate the most visibly, and talk the most about their good deeds. The deeds themselves may be real and useful. The motive is still admiration, and the test is the same as always. What happens when the good deed is not seen, not praised, and not rewarded? A communal narcissist often loses interest at exactly that point, while a genuinely kind person keeps going. Our guide to the types of narcissists explains communal narcissism alongside the grandiose, vulnerable, covert, and malignant forms, so you can see which pattern fits the person in your life.
Can A Narcissist Be A Good Person In A Relationship
This is the version of the question most readers are really asking, and it deserves a direct answer. A narcissist can be a good partner in moments, and can even be a loving partner in the early stages, when admiration is flowing and everything is new. The problem is not the beginning. The problem is what happens when the relationship stops being a source of admiration and starts asking for the ordinary work of partnership, compromise, patience, forgiveness, and putting someone else first. That is where the pattern usually shows itself, and that is where most partners discover the difference between being adored and being loved.
Being adored means you are valued for how you make the narcissist feel. Being loved means you are valued for who you are, including your needs, your limits, and your bad days. A narcissist is often excellent at adoration and poor at love, because love requires empathy, and empathy is the one capacity the pattern weakens most. When you are struggling, a narcissistic partner may minimise your pain, compete with it, or turn it into a story about them. When you set a boundary, they may treat it as rejection. When you succeed, they may feel threatened rather than proud. None of this means they never care. It means their care is unreliable, and unreliable care is painful to live with.
So can a narcissist be a good person in a relationship? The honest answer is that it depends on where they sit on the spectrum and whether they are willing to do the work. A person with mild traits who listens to feedback, owns their mistakes, and stays in therapy can build a genuinely good relationship over time. A person with full narcissistic personality disorder who refuses help, blames you for everything, and repeats the same harm for years is unlikely to become a safe partner, no matter how good the good days feel. Judge by the pattern across a year, not by the best week. If you want the deeper picture, our guide on whether narcissists are capable of love explains the difference between attachment, admiration, and love in plain terms.
Can A Covert Narcissist Be A Good Person
A covert narcissist is the quiet version of the pattern, and they confuse people more than any other type, because they often look like good people. Where a grandiose narcissist is loud, boastful, and obviously self centred, a covert narcissist is shy, sensitive, self deprecating, and often genuinely helpful. They may be the friend who always listens, the colleague who never takes credit, or the partner who seems endlessly patient. Underneath, the same core is there, entitlement, envy, a fragile sense of self, and low empathy, but it shows up as passive aggression, silent treatment, guilt trips, and playing the victim rather than as open arrogance.
So can a covert narcissist be a good person? They can do good things, often more consistently than a grandiose narcissist, because their public image depends on being seen as kind. The difficulty is the same as with every other type. The kindness often depends on being appreciated, and it often comes with a hidden cost. A covert narcissist may help you move house and then remind you of it for months. They may listen to your problems for hours and then use what you told them in an argument. They may play the victim so convincingly that you end up apologising for the harm they caused you. None of this makes them a monster. It makes them a person whose goodness is conditional, and conditional goodness needs the same test as everywhere else, what happens when you stop praising them, when you set a boundary, and when you need something they do not want to give.
Can A Vulnerable Narcissist Be A Good Person
A vulnerable narcissist is closely related to the covert type, and the two words are often used for the same pattern. The vulnerable narcissist feels small, anxious, and easily wounded, and they protect that wound with hypersensitivity, resentment, and a constant sense of being overlooked or mistreated. They may genuinely believe they are a good person who has been treated unfairly by the world, and in a way they are right, because many vulnerable narcissists were hurt early in life, and the pattern grew out of that hurt. Understanding where the pattern came from is important. It is not the same as accepting the harm it causes now.
A vulnerable narcissist can be a good person in the sense that they often have a real conscience and real guilt, more than a grandiose or malignant narcissist usually shows. They may feel terrible after hurting you, and they may mean their apology when they make it. The problem is that the apology rarely leads to lasting change, because the underlying pattern, fragile self worth defended by blame and withdrawal, is still running the show. They may be kind, thoughtful, and generous for weeks, and then collapse into self pity or rage after a single criticism, and the people around them learn to walk on eggshells to keep the peace. Goodness that depends on never being criticised is not reliable goodness, and reliability is what a relationship actually needs.
Can A Malignant Narcissist Be A Good Person
A malignant narcissist combines narcissistic traits with antisocial traits, which means grandiosity and entitlement plus a willingness to harm others without remorse, and sometimes pleasure in the harm itself. This is the most dangerous form of the pattern, and the honest answer here is the hardest one. A malignant narcissist can do good things, they can be charming, generous, and even protective of people they see as theirs, but the pattern of cruelty, deceit, and exploitation runs so deep that calling them a good person would ignore the harm they cause. Good acts do not cancel cruelty, and a person who is kind to some people and deliberately cruel to others is not a good person with flaws. They are a person whose kindness is a tool, and whose cruelty is the truth about how they treat people when they can get away with it.
If you are dealing with a malignant narcissist, the question of whether they are a good person is the wrong question. The right question is whether you are safe. Malignant narcissism is associated with manipulation, aggression, and a lack of remorse, and it is the form most likely to cause serious harm to partners, children, and colleagues. Do not try to find the good in them as a way to stay. Protect yourself first, get professional support, and make your decisions based on the harm you have experienced, not on the charm you have seen. If you are in danger, contact local support services or law enforcement. Your safety comes before any debate about character.
How Can You Tell Genuine Kindness From Performance
This is the most useful section in the article, because it turns a philosophical question into a practical test you can actually use. Genuine kindness and performed kindness look identical for about five minutes. They separate over time, and they separate in five specific ways. Watch for these, and keep a private note of what you see, with dates, so your memory cannot be talked out of the pattern later.
First, watch what happens when no one is watching. Genuine kindness continues in private. Performed kindness needs an audience, and it fades the moment the audience leaves. Second, watch what happens when kindness costs something. A genuinely kind person helps even when it is inconvenient, tiring, or expensive. A performer helps when it is easy and visible, and finds an excuse when it is not. Third, watch what happens after the kind act. Genuine kindness asks for nothing. Performed kindness keeps score, and the score gets read back to you in the next argument. Fourth, watch what happens when you set a boundary. A genuinely kind person respects it, even if they are disappointed. A performer treats the boundary as an insult, and punishes you for it with coldness, guilt, or rage. Fifth, watch what happens when you are struggling. A genuinely kind person moves toward your pain. A narcissist often minimises it, competes with it, or disappears until you are useful again.
Here is a quick way to run the test in your own life. Pick the three kindest things the person has done for you in the last six months. For each one, ask four questions. Was anyone else watching? Did it cost them anything real? Did they bring it up later as a debt? Did they treat you the same way the following week? If the answers are mostly no, no, yes, and no, you are looking at performance, not character. If the answers are mostly no audience, real cost, no debt, and yes, the same treatment continued, you may be looking at a person who is genuinely trying, and that is worth recognising, even if the rest of the pattern still needs work.
If the good moments keep pulling you back into a pattern that hurts you, you are not confused, you are trauma bonded. The Trauma Bond Breaker Bundle gives you a step by step plan to break the emotional pull, see the pattern clearly, and decide what you will accept in your own life, instead of deciding it in the glow of one good day.
Can A Narcissist Change To Be A Good Person
Yes, change is possible, and no, it is not common, and both halves of that sentence matter. The Psychology Today overview of narcissism notes that narcissistic personality disorder is treatable with long term psychotherapy, and that treatment focuses on building healthier self esteem, understanding how behaviour affects others, and learning to relate to people in less destructive ways. The WebMD overview of narcissistic personality disorder says the same thing in plainer terms, there is no quick cure, therapy is the main treatment, and progress is slow because most people with the pattern do not believe they have a problem.
That last point is the key. Change requires three things that are rare in combination. First, self awareness, the person has to see the pattern and admit it is theirs. Second, motivation, the person has to want to change badly enough to stay in therapy when it gets uncomfortable, which it always does. Third, time, real change in a personality pattern takes years of sustained work, not weeks. Therapy approaches that help include long term talk therapy focused on the underlying fragile self, schema therapy, which works on the deep beliefs formed in childhood, and cognitive behavioural therapy, which targets specific harmful thought patterns and behaviours. None of these create empathy overnight. What they can do, slowly, is help a person notice their own patterns, pause before acting on them, and choose a kinder response often enough that the pattern starts to shift.
What real change looks like is worth describing, because it is very different from what people usually accept as change. Real change is consistent behaviour over months and years, not one apology and one good week. It is owning harm without blaming you for it. It is apologising and then doing something different the next time the same situation comes up. It is accepting criticism without rage or collapse. It is seeking therapy on their own, staying in it, and letting the work show in how they treat people when nobody is watching. If you see that, take it seriously, it is real, and it is rare, and it deserves respect. If you see promises, tears, and a return to the same behaviour within weeks, that is not change. That is the cycle, and the cycle is the pattern.
How To Live With A Narcissistic Person
Whether or not the person in your life can be a good person, you still have to decide how to live with them, and that decision is yours to make, not theirs. Start by accepting the pattern as it is, not as you wish it were. Hope is not a plan. A plan is boundaries, written down and enforced the same way every time. Decide what you will accept and what you will not, say it once in plain language, and then follow through with action, not with another argument. Short sentences work best. I am not discussing this. My answer is no. I am ending this conversation now. Then stop talking, because every extra reason you give is a new opening to argue.
Second, stop measuring the relationship by the good days. Measure it by the bad days, and by what the bad days cost you. Keep a private record of what happened and when, so the good moments cannot erase the pattern from your memory. Third, protect your own support system. A narcissist’s pattern works best when you are isolated, so keep your friends, your family, and your own interests close, even when the relationship tries to narrow your world. Fourth, get professional support for yourself, whether or not the narcissist ever gets help. A therapist who understands narcissistic abuse can help you see the pattern clearly, practise boundaries, and rebuild trust in your own judgment.
Finally, know when staying costs too much. If you feel constantly drained, anxious, or afraid, if you doubt your own memory and judgment, if you have stopped recognising yourself, those are not signs of a difficult relationship. They are signs of a harmful one, and no amount of good moments makes a harmful relationship safe. You do not need a final verdict on whether the person is good or bad to leave a relationship that is hurting you. You only need an honest look at the pattern and a decision about what you will accept.
Myths Vs Facts About Narcissists And Goodness
The myths around this question keep people stuck, because they teach you to look for the wrong thing. Here are the ones that matter most, with the facts that replace them.
Myth, a narcissist can never do anything good. Fact, narcissists do good things regularly, and some of those acts are genuinely helpful. The question is never whether the good act happened. It is what motivated it and whether it lasts.
Myth, if they were nice to you once, they must be a good person underneath. Fact, a single kind act proves a person is capable of kindness in that moment. It does not prove settled character, and it does not cancel a pattern of harm.
Myth, narcissists have no empathy at all. Fact, many narcissists have cognitive empathy, they can understand what you feel and even predict it accurately, while struggling with emotional empathy, actually feeling it with you. That is why they can be so skilled at reading people and still so cold in how they treat them.
Myth, a narcissist who feels guilty must be changing. Fact, guilt is common, especially in vulnerable narcissists, and it does not reliably lead to change. Change is shown by different behaviour over time, not by how bad someone feels after the harm.
Myth, only a therapist can tell you whether to stay or leave. Fact, a therapist can help you see clearly, but the decision is yours. You are the one living with the pattern, and you are the one who knows what it costs you.
Myth, calling someone a narcissist settles the question of whether they are good. Fact, the label describes a pattern, not a moral verdict. Some people with strong narcissistic traits live decent, kind lives once they do the work. Some people with no diagnosis at all are cruel. Judge the behaviour, judge the pattern, and judge what it does to the people around them.
The Honest Answer, In Short
So can a narcissist be a good person? A narcissist can do good things, and a person with mild traits who does the work can become a genuinely good person over time. A person with full narcissistic personality disorder who refuses help and keeps repeating the same harm is unlikely to be a good person in the way that matters, not because they are evil, but because their pattern keeps hurting the people closest to them, and goodness is measured by how you treat people over time. The kindest version of the truth is also the most useful one. You do not have to decide who they are, deep down, forever. You only have to decide what you will accept, what you will protect, and what the pattern in front of you is actually doing to your life.
You do not need a final verdict on their character to protect your own peace. If you want exact words for the next hard conversation, a plan to hold your boundaries without another exhausting argument, and a steady way to see the pattern clearly, the Survival Workbook gives you all three, so one more good day does not become one more year of waiting for change that never comes.
Frequently Asked Questions
Can a narcissist be a nice person?
Yes, a narcissist can be a nice person in the moment, and many are charming, generous, and fun to be around, especially in public or at the start of a relationship. The question is whether the niceness lasts when no one is watching, when they are criticised, or when kindness costs them something. Niceness that disappears under stress or turns into scorekeeping is performance, not character, so judge the pattern over months rather than one nice day.
Can a covert narcissist be a good person?
A covert narcissist can do good things, often more consistently than a grandiose narcissist, because their public image depends on being seen as kind and helpful. The difficulty is that their kindness often depends on being appreciated, and it can come with hidden costs like guilt trips, silent treatment, or favours that get collected later. Judge them the same way as any other type, by what happens in private, after a boundary, and when no one is watching.
Can a malignant narcissist be a good person?
A malignant narcissist can do good things and can be charming and protective of people they see as theirs, but their pattern combines narcissism with a willingness to harm others without remorse, so calling them a good person would ignore the cruelty in the pattern. If you are dealing with a malignant narcissist, the question of goodness is less important than the question of safety, so protect yourself first and get professional support.
Can a vulnerable narcissist be a good person?
A vulnerable narcissist can be a good person in the sense that they often have a real conscience and real guilt, more than a grandiose or malignant narcissist usually shows, and they may mean their apologies when they make them. The problem is that apology rarely leads to lasting change, because their fragile self worth is still defended by blame and withdrawal. Their kindness can be real, but it is unreliable, and reliability is what a relationship actually needs.
Can a narcissist be a good partner?
A narcissist can be a good partner in moments, especially early on when admiration is flowing and everything is new, but partnership requires empathy, compromise, and putting someone else first, which is where the pattern usually shows itself. A person with mild traits who listens to feedback, owns mistakes, and stays in therapy can build a genuinely good relationship over time. A person with full narcissistic personality disorder who refuses help and repeats the same harm for years is unlikely to become a safe partner.
Can a narcissist change to be a good person?
Yes, change is possible, but it is uncommon and slow, and it requires self awareness, a genuine desire to change, and years of sustained therapy, usually long term talk therapy or schema therapy. Real change shows as consistent behaviour over months and years, owning harm without blame, and treating people well when nobody is watching. Promises, tears, and one good week are not change, they are the cycle, so judge by behaviour over time rather than by words.
Can a narcissist truly love someone?
A narcissist can feel attachment, admiration, and a strong desire to keep someone close, and they may feel fierce loyalty to a small number of people. What is usually missing is love as genuine care for another person’s wellbeing, independent of what that person provides. Their relationships tend to be valued for admiration, status, or comfort rather than for who the other person is, so what looks like love is often closer to possession or idealisation.
What is healthy narcissism?
Healthy narcissism is confidence, pride in real achievements, and the ability to enjoy attention without exploiting anyone, and it is a normal part of a strong self image rather than a disorder. A healthy narcissist can build strong relationships, show empathy, and take pride in their abilities, because their self worth does not depend on putting others down. The difference from narcissistic personality disorder is the absence of exploitation, entitlement, and a persistent lack of empathy.
